There Is No Reasoning With a Pregnant Brain

Nine years ago, when I was pregnant for the first time, I overheard a very pregnant woman talking to her friend. I was strangely aware of pregnant women at that time because I had just found out I was expecting, and I remember hearing this woman complaining about almost everything to her friend, who tried her best to comfort her.

She whined about how big her stomach was, how heavy she felt, how she had nothing that fit, and how she was afraid of labor. I didn’t understand as I watched while holding my not-yet-showing pregnant belly. Wasn’t she happy she was pregnant? Why was she so miserable?

It was super naive of me to sit there and judge her for her complaints. I was barely pregnant and really had no idea what it was like to be that pregnant, but I certainly learned my lesson.

I learned that there are so many thoughts a pregnant woman has over the course of nine months, that to a non-pregnant person, seem completely irrational.

But, when you’re pregnant, surging with emotions and hormones and real life-changing events, those “irrational” thoughts make total sense. At least in your mind.

1. “I’m going to give birth to a cat — or an alien!”

Every night, you’re plagued with the same dream. It’s not a healthy baby girl in your belly that the ultrasound tech assured you, it’s definitely a cat. It doesn’t sound logical, but you’re convinced.

2. “I will only eat chicken if I can put Nutella on it!”

Food aversions are real, we get it. But, pregnancy has taken the Nutella obsession to the next-level.

3. “I am going to be pregnant forever.”

I don’t think in human history, a pregnant woman has been forever pregnant, but you’re convinced you’ll be the first.

4. “I will get a divorce if he doesn’t bring home Diet Coke.”

Cravings are no joke and pregnancy can bring its own tension to a relationship. If you tell your friends you had an epic fight with your husband over Diet Coke, they might be a little skeptical … unless they’ve been pregnant before themselves.

5. “I have to clean all the dishes, do all the laundry, and scrub the bottom of every pair of shoes.”

Nesting — you don’t get it unless you’ve lived it.

6. “If anyone comes near me with ___ I’ll lose it.”

Pregnancy nose is a weird thing, and unlike any time before, you’re extra sensitive to smells, and it can make you irrational. Yes, he is wearing that deodorant that makes you turn your nose, and before you were pregnant, you just ignored it. But you literally feel like you’re going to lose it if he wears that brand again.

7. “This house is completely unsafe.”

That squeaky floor. The corners of the coffee table. The endless baby-proofing options. You begin to wonder what you were thinking when you bought this house. Sure, it was great three months ago, and you had no problem with the window blinds and floors that can be slippery when it’s cold, but now it’s for a baby.

8. “I am just going to get comfortable with peeing my pants.”

You’ve already woken up three times since falling asleep because your bladder just can’t seem to keep it together. You begin to wonder if peeing your pants or wearing a diaper is what you need to be able to sleep. And, you seriously consider it.

9. “My body is ruined!”

You’ve gained 35 pounds in eight months. Your stomach is larger than you thought humanly possible, and your breasts have gained three cup sizes. Just as you didn’t believe your body would be able to grow like this, you’ll be surprised how well your body will shrink again. It’s not ruined!

10. “I am going to be so bad at this!”

Every person worries about this, and for me, it seemed to be in my thoughts more as I got closer to my due date. It’s normal to worry — it’s a big change, but you got this!

For some women, anxiety in pregnancy can be overwhelming. Some of these thoughts can be brushed aside and you can laugh about it because you know you’re going to be okay. But, if you find yourself focusing a lot of your time on anxiety, talk to your doctor about finding some relief.

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